A few months ago, a friend called me to ask for help. His sister is starting to have marital problems since her mother – in – law and sister – in – law moved in with them.
LL is a 34-year-old happily married woman with 2 kids – a girl and a boy. According to LL, life has been good to her and life was almost perfect. However, things started to change when her mother – in – law and unmarried sister – in – law started living with them.
Her mother – in – law and sister – in – law used to have a house of their own, however, when LL’s father – in – law passed away, LL thought she should invite them to live with them because their house is in a seedy part of the city. She was the one who talked to her husband about this but little did she know that this would start their problem.
Like a typical Chinese LL gave her mother – in – law and sister – in – law who is older than her husband the respect of an elder in the family. Everything seems to be fine in the beginning but things gradually became bad from good.
LL won’t be able to tell when it did start happening, but it seems to be a gradual thing that started to creep in to their life. Maybe because they have nothing else to do both mother – in – law and sister – in – law has nothing else to do, they started to meddle with LL’s house. They would decide what should be eaten for dinner and then they started arranging the furniture. Soon they started meddling with the affairs of LL’s family.
To be fair to LL’s husband, he did try to manage his mother and sister, however, things has gotten really bad already that they seem to be out – of – control and it has started to affect LL’s relationship with her husband. Out of desperation, LL asked her brother to call me and help fix the problem.
I, when LL’s in – laws were out of the house went there. LL was there with her husband; this for me is a good sign, because it signifies that they both acknowledge the problem and wants a solution for it. The first thing I notice is the LL’s mother – in –law and sister –in – law both occupies rooms that has the best Chi. This is not exactly bad, but usually the best chi should be given to the head or leader of the family. In this case, while they’re older than LL and her husband, it is still LL’s husband and LL that should be considered as the head of the family. The only solution I find here is for them to switch rooms.
Switching rooms is the only alternative because aside from the fact that LL’s in – laws has the room that has the best chi in the house, they also occupied the patriarchal sector of the house, thus empowering to head the household.
LL and her husband had to make up stories to switch rooms. But the good news is several months after they’ve switched rooms; LL reports that things are so much better.