It has been 3 days since I last posted something on this blog. I was kind of busy and I also thought that I needed some rest from the blog.
The first time I started this blog, it is because I was inspired by my favorite Filipino writer – Ricky Lee, to try writing again. It is something that I always wanted to do but my poor command of any written language, except maybe Chinese, seems to prevent me from pursuing that dream.
When I first set up this blog, it’s clear with me that I want to write about anything and everything under the sun as along as IT INTERESTS ME. I never thought that the blog would become a Feng Shui blog, well…more or less.
I still want to write about food, about my travels, I still want to tell stories, but it seems like that the blog has taken a life of its own. Sure Feng Shui is something that greatly interests me but sometimes writing about it has its down side. I do get a lot of ‘hate’ email and comments from people who says that they’re are ‘Christians’. I delete their comments and sometimes I try not to read them but they do get through me, it makes me wonder whether my posts has become ‘preachy’.
I also do get a lot of emails where people share with me their problems. Some of them I share here, but some of them are best not shared because they’re too personal and can be too depressing. Slowly, I find myself taking more time in saying my mantra and my Buddha offering because I do include some of the readers who I believe needs blessings from the Buddhas, Bodhisattvas, Deities, or Immortals. To be honest, to some extent it has become a burden and sometimes I feel like I’m taking on more than I can really handle.
The blog rest is really more than just for me to take time out to rest from writing, but it is really to assess whether I want to continue with the blog. I know it’s quite early for me to feel ‘burn out’ since the blog is only 4 months old but somehow the blog posts about Feng Shui has become some sort of a responsibility. I don’t like that feeling. I want this blog to be my outlet and not my responsibility.
The three days that I went on a blog rest didn’t prevent me from receiving emails from readers who says that they’ve been reading and following my blog. I also received quite a number of emails asking how come I haven’t been writing, and this I got right on the first day I didn’t post anything. Furthermore, emails about people sharing with me their problems and/or asking for a consult about Feng Shui or how to solve one of their problems, continued.
I’m glad that I took a blog rest because I got the chance to be able to read a short online biography of Paulo Coelho. According to Paulo Coelho, he writes primarily because he wants and thinks he has something to say, and in the process he hopes that he’s able to influence, inspire, or help a person. He further said that every writer who has put out his writing into the world has a responsibility to his readers. It’s a responsibility to be honest. This made me realize that I may have been a little selfish. If I simply want to be able to write, then I should have simply kept a private journal.
I should be thankful that people do take time out to read my blog and I should even be more thankful that my readers do take time out to interact with me. This is the power of a blog, you get to know whether you’re able to inspire, to influence, and most of all to help.
Why do I want to write? Why did I started this blog? Because I want to be able to share something, I believe I have something to share.
What Paulo Coelho shared made me realize that I, if I want to continue to write, have a responsibility both to myself and to my readers. I’ve decided that I will try to be more balance, I will write more about the other things that I want to write about, but more importantly, I will embrace the responsibility of the effects of what I write. I will take the responsibility of reading the ‘hate’ mails and look beyond the accusations that I’m an anti-Christ. I will take responsibility as much as I can and say mantras for people who really need them. But more than anything else I’ll take responsibility and enjoy writing what I want to write.